Tags |
|
|
Links |
|
|
Other Added - Child and Adolescent Anger - Ways That You Can Help Right Now
Consumers in the United States spend almost seven trillion dollars each year on consumer goods. In order to tap into this lucrative market, many major companies manufacture their products in exotic locales such as China, India, or other Asian nations due to their cheap labor and lax trade restrictions. Unfortunately, few of the industries that export their capitol across the Pacific realize that they could save more money with one short trip across the southern border to the maquiladoras of CaliBaja based in Mexicali, Baja California and Calexico, California.Because of international trade agreements such as NAFTA, manufacturers can import raw material and heavy equipment into Mexico duty and tariff-free in an arrangement referred to as the maquiladora program. The word maquiladora is derived from the Spanish term that translates to “to submit something to the action of the machine.” The governments of the United States and Mexico developed a mutually beneficial economic partnership that allows American businesses to utilize Mexican labor laws while maintaining production standards and levels found in the best American factories. This agreement has been the secret weapon used by such prominent companies as 3M Corp, General Electric, Boeing, Sanyo, Wolf Electronics, and Page Electric
o Practice reflective listening. Repeat back to the child what you hear her saying in a non-judgmental, soothing tone. This provides a comforting effect, and lets the child know she’s being heard. Start with phrases like, “So what I hear you saying is…” or “So you’re saying…” Stick with their words and references, using as little interpretation and as few of your own words as possible.
o Express empathy and understanding. This is simply a matter of imagining yourself in the child’s position, and attempting to see things from his viewpoint. Use phrases like, “When I put myself in your shoes, I can see why you would feel that way,” or “From where you stand, it looks like…” or “I think I see what you mean” or “That makes sense to me.”
o Avoid teaching, correcting or instructing while your child is angry. Only when the child starts to calm down and relax, you may want to share some of your own similar struggles or experiences. The goal is to help them deal with and understand their anger. Discipline needs to be kept separate from this kind of communication, and administered when both you and the child are calm. Th
The Alexander Technique is a profound method of releasing unwanted muscular tension throughout the body that many of us have accumulated over the years. This excessive muscular tension often starts in childhood and, if left unchecked, can give rise later in life to a whole range of common ailments such as arthritis, neck and back pain, migraine, hypertension, sciatica, insomnia and even depression. Vast amounts of money are being spent on the treatment of these illnesses, yet the number of patients carries on increasing. By learning the Alexander Technique, however, many people could be helped to understand the causes of their problems and, through the Technique, be taught how they can help themselves, so that their aches and pains would diminish or are avoided altogether.The Technique was devised over a hundred years ago by Frederick Alexander - an Australian actor who kept on loosing his voice while performing. Alexander was determined to find a solution to his curious problem and this took him on a journey of self-discovery that, not only gave him the solution to his voice problem, but he was also able to cure himself of asthma of which he had suffered from birth. It has been claimed that Alexander's research was one of the greatest discoveries of the twentieth century.The Ale
· Do everything in your power to get to know them.
· Find out what they like to do and do it with them. That’s a stretch in some cases, but do the best you can. They will notice the effort. Stay true to yourself—if they see you trying to become like them, they’ll lose respect for you.
· Ask them to tell you about the things they’re interested in. You may have to prove that you’re really interested before they will open up, but if you’re sincere and persistent, they will start talking.
· Be a steady, loving presence in their life. You may have to forego some of your other activities, but if you have an adolescent who is possibly moving toward violence or suicide, it’s worth it.
· Get in touch with your own healthy anger, so that you have the personal power and confidence to deal with the energy of adolescent anger.
· Work to master humor and love. Find as many ways as possible to have fun with the adolescent and show your love. Make sure that you are pursuing the relationship for them, and not to fulfill some unmet needs from your own past.
· Consult with other adults and parents who are good with teenagers. Watch how they interact with kids and learn from their example.
· Pray. You’re going to need all the help you can get, and you need to know you are not alone in your mission to bring love to this unhappy child.
EMBRACING THE OUTCASTS AND MISFITS
This is simply impossible if you have outcasts and misfits in your own subconscious body/mind. So the first order of business here is to make sure you have found, embraced and made a place for the children within you that you or others may have found that represent remnants of memories that you have yet to resolve. These are the inner children that symbolize your pain, shame and self-doubt.
Rest assured that the outcast child that you approach in the outer world will not accept your embrace if they see unresolved fear and anger in your eyes or actions.
Since we know that the outcasts and misfits are the children most likely to become violent, it only follows that we must pull them into the arms of love and/or acceptance, and find a place where they fit. If our system doesn’t have a place where a child fits, there’s something wrong with the system, not the child.
Look around you in your family and your community. Do you see the outcasts and misfits? The ones that seem to have no friends, or who only hang out with others like them? Look for the ones that don’t act “right,” are too this or too that or not enough of the other. Especially look for the ones that are not talking about their feelings, and seem to carry a lot of depression and/or anger.
Genius often hides in such places. If you are wise, healthy and dedicated enough to win an inroad to the heart and mind of one of these “personas non grata,” you may discover a hidden treasure. The movie “Good Will Hunting” depicts such a case, where an angry, violent misfit is also a gifted genius. The older movie “The Breakfast Club” also shows us the beauty in the shadow of the misfit.
Kindness and compassion will sometimes be greeted with doubt, fear and even anger at first. If you really mean it, and have the courage to do so, you can penetrate that outer shell and touch the tender heart within. You may be saving someone’s life.
Consider the outcasts and misfits in your world to be unexplored territories of your own soul, undiscovered treasures waiting for you. The rewards will be as great for you as for those you help.
When we look deep enough into any living being, we find the face of God.
Teach this to your children, like Max did in the following example.
Max had come to me for almost four years, to heal from a very painful childhood, and to learn to manage his anger toward his wife. He was making excellent progress, and was tapering off in his sessions.
Max’s son Derek was six years old, and the apple of his dad’s eye. Max was determined to give Derek the healthy guidance, love and positive role modeling he had never received as a child.
Smiling ear to ear, Max told me of some of his recent successes with his wife and son. “I have always been afraid I would end up homeless and living under a bridge. So, I decided to confront this fear a little more directly. After church Sunday, Derek and I took about 40 hamburgers to the homeless people living under the overpass downtown. Derek loved it! Now he wants to feed all of the homeless people in the city. Those people were so grateful.”
Max was quiet for a moment, as he wiped his eyes and regained his composure. He had given a great gift to some outcasts and misfits, to his son, and to himself.
METHODS FOR HELPING CHILDREN DEAL WITH THEIR ANGER
· What to say—When your child is in the middle of expressing anger, your verbal response is extremely important. Though it remains true that your non-verbal signals will speak more loudly than your words, we must not underestimate the power of the spoken word, particularly during intense emotional experiences.
o For a very young child, or if the anger is being expressed mostly in non-verbal ways, say something to the effect of, “Wow! I can see that you are really angry right now. I’m sure you have good reasons to be angry. Your anger seems really strong to me. I want you to know that it’s okay with me for you to be angry, and I want to help you deal with it so that nobody gets hurt—including you.” In these and other words, communicate the idea that “There’s nothing wrong with feeling anger, the important thing is what you do with it.”
o Practice reflective listening. Repeat back to the child what you hear her saying in a non-judgmental, soothing tone. This provides a comforting effect, and lets the child know she’s being heard. Start with phrases like, “So what I hear you saying is…” or “So you’re saying…” Stick with their words and references, using as little interpretation and as few of your own words as possible.
o Express empathy and understanding. This is simply a matter of imagining yourself in the child’s position, and attempting to see things from his viewpoint. Use phrases like, “When I put myself in your shoes, I can see why you would feel that way,” or “From where you stand, it looks like…” or “I think I see what you mean” or “That makes sense to me.”
o Avoid teaching, correcting or instructing while your child is angry. Only when the child starts to calm down and relax, you may want to share some of your own similar struggles or experiences. The goal is to help them deal with and understand their anger. Discipline needs to be kept separate from this kind of communication, and administered when both you and the child are calm. Th
With regards to the question of simultaneous submissions, I fear I may not be able to offer a set answer. As a publisher, I am not enamored by the thought of an author sending me a manuscript that is currently floating among several other slush piles. However, as an author, I am tempted to cast a wide net for my book and hope somebody bites. The thought of waiting for one publisher to pass on a book before sending it to another editor can be daunting for authors, particularly if a favored publisher takes a year to decide.I have read stories of books that were rejected by one publisher years after they had been accepted and published elsewhere. It is funny to read, yes, but when one looks at simultaneous submissions from two different perspectives - as I have the ability to do - one will know that there may be serious repercussions to violating the wishes of a publisher or editor. As with any aspect of the publishing industry, there are pros and cons to sending out a book to several publishers at once, and there are things authors must know about publishers before they submit.In addition to producing quality fiction and non-fiction in eBook, trade and/or hardcover format, a book publisher is ultimately in the business of selling books and making money. In order to stay in business
· Consult with other adults and parents who are good with teenagers. Watch how they interact with kids and learn from their example.
· Pray. You’re going to need all the help you can get, and you need to know you are not alone in your mission to bring love to this unhappy child.
EMBRACING THE OUTCASTS AND MISFITS
This is simply impossible if you have outcasts and misfits in your own subconscious body/mind. So the first order of business here is to make sure you have found, embraced and made a place for the children within you that you or others may have found that represent remnants of memories that you have yet to resolve. These are the inner children that symbolize your pain, shame and self-doubt.
Rest assured that the outcast child that you approach in the outer world will not accept your embrace if they see unresolved fear and anger in your eyes or actions.
Since we know that the outcasts and misfits are the children most likely to become violent, it only follows that we must pull them into the arms of love and/or acceptance, and find a place where they fit. If our system doesn’t have a place where a child fits, there’s something wrong with the system, not the child.
Look around you in your family and your community. Do you see the outcasts and misfits? The ones that seem to have no friends, or who only hang out with others like them? Look for the ones that don’t act “right,” are too this or too that or not enough of the other. Especially look for the ones that are not talking about their feelings, and seem to carry a lot of depression and/or anger.
Genius often hides in such places. If you are wise, healthy and dedicated enough to win an inroad to the heart and mind of one of these “personas non grata,” you may discover a hidden treasure. The movie “Good Will Hunting” depicts such a case, where an angry, violent misfit is also a gifted genius. The older movie “The Breakfast Club” also shows us the beauty in the shadow of the misfit.
Kindness and compassion will sometimes be greeted with doubt, fear and even anger at first. If you really mean it, and have the courage to do so, you can penetrate that outer shell and touch the tender heart within. You may be saving someone’s life.
Consider the outcasts and misfits in your world to be unexplored territories of your own soul, undiscovered treasures waiting for you. The rewards will be as great for you as for those you help.
When we look deep enough into any living being, we find the face of God.
Teach this to your children, like Max did in the following example.
Max had come to me for almost four years, to heal from a very painful childhood, and to learn to manage his anger toward his wife. He was making excellent progress, and was tapering off in his sessions.
Max’s son Derek was six years old, and the apple of his dad’s eye. Max was determined to give Derek the healthy guidance, love and positive role modeling he had never received as a child.
Smiling ear to ear, Max told me of some of his recent successes with his wife and son. “I have always been afraid I would end up homeless and living under a bridge. So, I decided to confront this fear a little more directly. After church Sunday, Derek and I took about 40 hamburgers to the homeless people living under the overpass downtown. Derek loved it! Now he wants to feed all of the homeless people in the city. Those people were so grateful.”
Max was quiet for a moment, as he wiped his eyes and regained his composure. He had given a great gift to some outcasts and misfits, to his son, and to himself.
METHODS FOR HELPING CHILDREN DEAL WITH THEIR ANGER
· What to say—When your child is in the middle of expressing anger, your verbal response is extremely important. Though it remains true that your non-verbal signals will speak more loudly than your words, we must not underestimate the power of the spoken word, particularly during intense emotional experiences.
o For a very young child, or if the anger is being expressed mostly in non-verbal ways, say something to the effect of, “Wow! I can see that you are really angry right now. I’m sure you have good reasons to be angry. Your anger seems really strong to me. I want you to know that it’s okay with me for you to be angry, and I want to help you deal with it so that nobody gets hurt—including you.” In these and other words, communicate the idea that “There’s nothing wrong with feeling anger, the important thing is what you do with it.”
o Practice reflective listening. Repeat back to the child what you hear her saying in a non-judgmental, soothing tone. This provides a comforting effect, and lets the child know she’s being heard. Start with phrases like, “So what I hear you saying is…” or “So you’re saying…” Stick with their words and references, using as little interpretation and as few of your own words as possible.
o Express empathy and understanding. This is simply a matter of imagining yourself in the child’s position, and attempting to see things from his viewpoint. Use phrases like, “When I put myself in your shoes, I can see why you would feel that way,” or “From where you stand, it looks like…” or “I think I see what you mean” or “That makes sense to me.”
o Avoid teaching, correcting or instructing while your child is angry. Only when the child starts to calm down and relax, you may want to share some of your own similar struggles or experiences. The goal is to help them deal with and understand their anger. Discipline needs to be kept separate from this kind of communication, and administered when both you and the child are calm. Th
A great way to raise money is with a Spring flower bulb fundraiser. This is usually done as an order-taker sale from a brochure showing colorful pictures and descriptions of available flowers and plants.You collect payment in advance, place your order, and arrange for pickup or home delivery when your supplier ships your group order. You can do a flower bulb fundraiser at any time of the year, but they work best in late Winter when people start thinking about their gardens and landscaping.Getting started Picking the right supplier is key to your fundraising success. You want a company that's been in business for many years and that has a strong fundraising program.Request a sample catalog from your top three choices and compare product offerings and prices. You'll sell more if the prices are low and the brochure is colorful and easy to read.Once you've picked your supplier, there are two ways to generate sales. One is the traditional door-to-door sales approach and the other is hosting a spring gardening event. There's no reason why you can't do both!Sales tips For in person sales, following a sales script produces the best results. There are three things you want to do right away with each prospect.1 - Look the customer in the eye and smile as you e
Genius often hides in such places. If you are wise, healthy and dedicated enough to win an inroad to the heart and mind of one of these “personas non grata,” you may discover a hidden treasure. The movie “Good Will Hunting” depicts such a case, where an angry, violent misfit is also a gifted genius. The older movie “The Breakfast Club” also shows us the beauty in the shadow of the misfit.
Kindness and compassion will sometimes be greeted with doubt, fear and even anger at first. If you really mean it, and have the courage to do so, you can penetrate that outer shell and touch the tender heart within. You may be saving someone’s life.
Consider the outcasts and misfits in your world to be unexplored territories of your own soul, undiscovered treasures waiting for you. The rewards will be as great for you as for those you help.
When we look deep enough into any living being, we find the face of God.
Teach this to your children, like Max did in the following example.
Max had come to me for almost four years, to heal from a very painful childhood, and to learn to manage his anger toward his wife. He was making excellent progress, and was tapering off in his sessions.
Max’s son Derek was six years old, and the apple of his dad’s eye. Max was determined to give Derek the healthy guidance, love and positive role modeling he had never received as a child.
Smiling ear to ear, Max told me of some of his recent successes with his wife and son. “I have always been afraid I would end up homeless and living under a bridge. So, I decided to confront this fear a little more directly. After church Sunday, Derek and I took about 40 hamburgers to the homeless people living under the overpass downtown. Derek loved it! Now he wants to feed all of the homeless people in the city. Those people were so grateful.”
Max was quiet for a moment, as he wiped his eyes and regained his composure. He had given a great gift to some outcasts and misfits, to his son, and to himself.
METHODS FOR HELPING CHILDREN DEAL WITH THEIR ANGER
· What to say—When your child is in the middle of expressing anger, your verbal response is extremely important. Though it remains true that your non-verbal signals will speak more loudly than your words, we must not underestimate the power of the spoken word, particularly during intense emotional experiences.
o For a very young child, or if the anger is being expressed mostly in non-verbal ways, say something to the effect of, “Wow! I can see that you are really angry right now. I’m sure you have good reasons to be angry. Your anger seems really strong to me. I want you to know that it’s okay with me for you to be angry, and I want to help you deal with it so that nobody gets hurt—including you.” In these and other words, communicate the idea that “There’s nothing wrong with feeling anger, the important thing is what you do with it.”
o Practice reflective listening. Repeat back to the child what you hear her saying in a non-judgmental, soothing tone. This provides a comforting effect, and lets the child know she’s being heard. Start with phrases like, “So what I hear you saying is…” or “So you’re saying…” Stick with their words and references, using as little interpretation and as few of your own words as possible.
o Express empathy and understanding. This is simply a matter of imagining yourself in the child’s position, and attempting to see things from his viewpoint. Use phrases like, “When I put myself in your shoes, I can see why you would feel that way,” or “From where you stand, it looks like…” or “I think I see what you mean” or “That makes sense to me.”
o Avoid teaching, correcting or instructing while your child is angry. Only when the child starts to calm down and relax, you may want to share some of your own similar struggles or experiences. The goal is to help them deal with and understand their anger. Discipline needs to be kept separate from this kind of communication, and administered when both you and the child are calm. Th
Restaurants have a reputation for making people gain weight due to the huge portions and unhealthy foods. However, you don't have to give up eating out if you are trying to lose weight. You can still eat out and lose weight if you follow these strategies:Get Zero Calorie DrinksThe easiest way to cut down on calories is to avoid soft drinks. A large coke has as many calories as a burger! Don't get sugar-loaded drinks. Instead, drink water or unsweetened ice tea. Freshly brewed ice tea is very popular in restaurants because it tastes good and doesn't make you gain weight.Go Easy On BreadA slice of bread with butter has around 130 calories. When faced with a large bread basket, it's easy to munch away three or more pieces! If you do that, the bread will cost you as many calories as the main dish. Be wise and limit yourself to one piece.Don't Arrive Too HungryYou can't be rational when you are starving. If you are way too hungry by the time you get to a restaurant, you'll just eat everything in sight. Grab a small snack before you head to a restaurant, so it curbs off your hunger and you can think clearly when making your food choices.Make Healthier Food ChoicesOpt for chicken or fish instead of red meat, and baked
Smiling ear to ear, Max told me of some of his recent successes with his wife and son. “I have always been afraid I would end up homeless and living under a bridge. So, I decided to confront this fear a little more directly. After church Sunday, Derek and I took about 40 hamburgers to the homeless people living under the overpass downtown. Derek loved it! Now he wants to feed all of the homeless people in the city. Those people were so grateful.”
Max was quiet for a moment, as he wiped his eyes and regained his composure. He had given a great gift to some outcasts and misfits, to his son, and to himself.
METHODS FOR HELPING CHILDREN DEAL WITH THEIR ANGER
· What to say—When your child is in the middle of expressing anger, your verbal response is extremely important. Though it remains true that your non-verbal signals will speak more loudly than your words, we must not underestimate the power of the spoken word, particularly during intense emotional experiences.
o For a very young child, or if the anger is being expressed mostly in non-verbal ways, say something to the effect of, “Wow! I can see that you are really angry right now. I’m sure you have good reasons to be angry. Your anger seems really strong to me. I want you to know that it’s okay with me for you to be angry, and I want to help you deal with it so that nobody gets hurt—including you.” In these and other words, communicate the idea that “There’s nothing wrong with feeling anger, the important thing is what you do with it.”
o Practice reflective listening. Repeat back to the child what you hear her saying in a non-judgmental, soothing tone. This provides a comforting effect, and lets the child know she’s being heard. Start with phrases like, “So what I hear you saying is…” or “So you’re saying…” Stick with their words and references, using as little interpretation and as few of your own words as possible.
o Express empathy and understanding. This is simply a matter of imagining yourself in the child’s position, and attempting to see things from his viewpoint. Use phrases like, “When I put myself in your shoes, I can see why you would feel that way,” or “From where you stand, it looks like…” or “I think I see what you mean” or “That makes sense to me.”
o Avoid teaching, correcting or instructing while your child is angry. Only when the child starts to calm down and relax, you may want to share some of your own similar struggles or experiences. The goal is to help them deal with and understand their anger. Discipline needs to be kept separate from this kind of communication, and administered when both you and the child are calm. Th
We all want to achieve the toned and slender look that working out gives your body, right? Strong and sleek and ready to be shown off – what’s not to love! Unfortunately, achieving that gorgeous body can sometimes be harder work than it would be in an ideal world, and working out can just get plain old boring after a while. And while the incentive to exercise is always there, it sometimes simply isn’t strong enough to drag us through those predictable, repetitive sessions. Who isn’t jealous of those energetic folks who say they love exercise? Thankfully there is a fitness company called Proform treadmills who have come up with a plan for the rest of us, and now, with Proform treadmills and iFit technology, we can learn to love exercise too.There is no doubt that Proform treadmills are an excellent tool to help us get fit. One of the most well known names in fitness equipment, Pro form treadmills combine quality construction with technological innovation, all at a reasonable price. Manufactured by Icon Fitness, one of the largest producers of exercise equipment in the US, the Proform treadmill package includes quality Proform treadmill parts, including good motors, clear and easy to read electronic readouts, and other great features, including a running deck with adjustable cushioning, e
o Practice reflective listening. Repeat back to the child what you hear her saying in a non-judgmental, soothing tone. This provides a comforting effect, and lets the child know she’s being heard. Start with phrases like, “So what I hear you saying is…” or “So you’re saying…” Stick with their words and references, using as little interpretation and as few of your own words as possible.
o Express empathy and understanding. This is simply a matter of imagining yourself in the child’s position, and attempting to see things from his viewpoint. Use phrases like, “When I put myself in your shoes, I can see why you would feel that way,” or “From where you stand, it looks like…” or “I think I see what you mean” or “That makes sense to me.”
o Avoid teaching, correcting or instructing while your child is angry. Only when the child starts to calm down and relax, you may want to share some of your own similar struggles or experiences. The goal is to help them deal with and understand their anger. Discipline needs to be kept separate from this kind of communication, and administered when both you and the child are calm. That way the child gets the clear message that it is not their emotion that is being disciplined, it is their behavior.
· What to do—If your child is small enough, you might want to try holding her during her anger episode. This has been found to be highly effective in many cases. It provides loving, powerful and safe boundaries when the child is feeling out of control. The non-verbal message is, “I’m here. I’m not going to leave you. I’m not going to hurt you, and I won’t let you hurt yourself or anyone else. I’m going to hold you until you feel safe again.” Here are some recommendations to make this procedure safe and successful:
o If you are extremely afraid or angry yourself, do not try this technique. Your emotions will feed the anger and fear of your child and make the situation worse.
o If you feel comfortable doing so, hold the child from behind, ideally with him sitting in your lap. Protect your face in case he tosses his head back toward you. The goal is for no one to get hurt.
o There needs to be both love and power in your embrace. Strong but not too strong, relaxed but not too relaxed. This lets the child know you are in charge, that you love her and can and will protect her.
o Be ready and willing to devote some time to this. If you don’t complete the process, you may do more harm than good. Hold the child, and wait until he calms down and relaxes. Often he might cry or even fall asleep as the anger subsides.
Through this gesture you are communicating love, acceptance, safety, protection and power all at the same time.
· What to have the child do—In some cases, the child may need to release anger physically. This can be accomplished in a number of ways:
o Supervised play with toys, or play therapy in a professional setting, can be very effective in helping children release anger. The violence that occurs between the toy characters is non-destructive, and can be very informative to the therapist and/or the parent who is observing. This can also include drawing pictures, or throwing clay against a wall or board where no harm can be done.
o Hitting pillows or a mattress with a harmless object such as a nerf bat or bataca bat. This can be done in a playful manner, and the child will still receive benefit. In therapy, I often call it “the anger game,, so that children feel safe in approaching the activity.
o Children may sometimes benefit from the “temper tantrum technique." Parents should use their own judgment as to when it is necessary to contract for the services of a professional for this type of exercise.
o One of the best parents I know told me that he had his daughters use the “Name it, claim it, aim it” technique for dealing with anger. In other words he taught them to put a name on their feeling, take responsibility for it, and direct it into some kind of release or constructive activity. An example might go something like, “I’m angry and sad, Daddy,” (naming and claiming it) “and I want you to help me talk to Bobby about taking my things” (aiming it). This is an excellent approach, and I highly recommend that parents use this and any other guidelines they run across that help them to teach their children to manage and express their emotions in healthy ways.
HTTP = HTML link (for blogs, profiles,phorums):
<a href="http://www.otheradded.com/article/284457/otheradded-Child-and-Adolescent-Anger--Ways-That-You-Can-Help-Right-Now.html">Child and Adolescent Anger - Ways That You Can Help Right Now</a>
BB link (for phorums):
[url=http://www.otheradded.com/article/284457/otheradded-Child-and-Adolescent-Anger--Ways-That-You-Can-Help-Right-Now.html]Child and Adolescent Anger - Ways That You Can Help Right Now[/url]
Related Articles:
The Importance Of Fundraising By Non Profits
21 Sure Fire Ways to Lose Weight
Bookmark it:
|